Washington DC
Mademoiselle D
03.01

Knowing that this trip was going to be a bit of business and an invitation to be tourist for the weekend in our nation's capitol, I had to accept. You see I was mainly going to view some of my father's artwork and then sneak in a few viewings of my own...

Now when I think of the capital of this great nation the word 'government' comes to mind...Government...as in government subsidie,, welfare programs, tax reforms, and lest we forget...government cheese (more on that later) ... I was not prepared for what I found...

It rains a great deal in Washington DC, you are encouraged even if you are told by the weather man that it will be sunny and cool to bring an umbrella & a raincoat. Trust me.

The city itself is not too dis-similar from those you might have visited except that rather than little pockets of culture i.e.: Chinatown, Little Italy, the culture is everywhere. And because there exists some very strict architectural and structural laws, buildings in DC can only have a certain number of floors. Thusly, providing you with a less than bold and more chill skyline and assisting the Washington Monument in looking even more phallic. By the way, the architecture in DC is beautiful and unique! The colonial row homes and townhouses are truly amazing. Everything fits together so neatly.

I stayed at The Northumberland. The Northumberland is an apartment building that is listed in the national registry of historic buildings and houses the old money art and political homosexual set, with few exceptions to some literary types. It is very old world, Italian marble, mahogany woods, crown moldings, an elevator that my 85 year old Grandmother moves faster than. The great part of this ultra private building is the 24/7 Concierge/Security desk that is staffed with a small group of multi-lingual gorgeous Latin men. The engraved brass sign on top of the desk states that they will service your needs any time of the day or nightÉmy God if they only knew what I was thinking.

I had the pleasure of staying with a dear friend who also happens to be a Pulitzer Prize nominated journalist. He works at the Washington Post and other than reporting on the phenomenon that is the local city government, he gets to do research of all sorts for his stories. One such piece involved the usage of crack dropping to extreme lows due to the new rage in the drug kingdom of a special hybrid of hydroponically grown marijuana called HYDRO. You can purchase it on the`hill (no not capitol hill) another hill...since this road warrior journalist had spent most of his time in Latin America covering the drug trade in Colombia, he was just the man for the job. Armed with his pipe known as `Da Bitch`, we, uh hmm, researched.

Having never experienced crack cocaine and with the fog of my drug induced days at University far behind me, I can assure you that I was certainly not myself after this experimentation. The high is well beyond hunger, lethargy and sexual potency. If you could mix the pleasures and plusses of all those things that can be done to assist your libido, well let's just say, we have found something else for Bob Dole to be happy about. This became a ritual before going out in the Nation's capitalÉevery evening during my entire stay and I must say banging da bitch certainly makes one a bit more open to new places, people and things...

My first evening we dined at a typical Washington DC spot for politicos and their extremely young and nubile assistants/interns called the Capitol Grill (the name says it all). All cheese and sleaze...the scent of lobbyists hits you the moment you enter the front door's threshold. The food was Bones meets the Peachtree Cafe' (meaning the menu is as consistent and old money as Elizabeth Astor dining at The Colony in NYC around 1961). And if the definition of `Government Cheese' could be defined in my terms it would be this place, the people, their clothes, hair styles and attitudes were so bloody middle America it was astounding...and some of these fuckers run our country...everyone looked like walking Velveeta!

Having put this place far behind me and being so stoned as not to care we decided to grab dessert elsewhere (thank you God!)...We went to this Brazilian coffee house (it is a small DC chain with an unusual name, don't ask me, because I can NOT recall) that had the most unique concept, `table-top' smores. Yes that old campground favorite! Or so my dining companions told me. They bring this fondue-like apparatus to your table and all the necessary condiments to assist you with roasting a marshmallow in a small flame and then surrounding it with Hershey's chocolat and graham cracker goodness......this place should come to the ATL, or they need to offer this as a special at Cafe' Intermezzo.

Later that evening, we would down at Chi Cha Lounge (on U between 16 & 17th), it was on the walk in the rain home and a place I had been meaning to try. It was very chill...the DJ is unobtrusively tucked away against the wall in the middle of the room between the bar and couches/tables/chairs scenario...think Ten27 in Atlanta meets KARMA...there is NO dance floor just a lot of `headsÕ chillin' and checking out the vibe. At the bar there is a little of the Kroger frozen foods/meat-market aspect but it is not too awful... and it was the 23 year old aspect with windbreakers on that kept me away.

Next day in the late morning,, I arrived to the Dupont Circle home of one ex-cabinet member of the US Ambassador to France and his lovely wife who felt the need to tell me to wipe my feet as I was doing so. He an octogenarian with chronic halitosis, she a Washingtonian thru and thru, her daddy was a politician {seems to be going around in this city}, who made a point within the first 30 seconds of meeting me to name drop everyone she knew and who they were in political history (In the back of my mind, I was secretly hoping that she had slept with these people and I was going to get some real dirt).

Nevertheless, the paintings were smashing and the octogenarian explained with great delight the day he had coffee with my father at a cafe' in Paris...then he leaned in and with breath the scent of death gave me a good long look over and gave me a compliment of sorts, "You look like a young Maria Callas, before that bastard Onassis ruined her!" ...and with that I departed, eyes watering and hopes stomped upon.

I stopped for coffee at one of what seems like 4 million Starbucks, one on every corner of this city all the way to Resto, VA I am sure. From there I meandered to the COCORAN, a private gallery that I got lost trying to find, but it was so worth the walk in the rain...think of all of the coolest artists in the world, remove all of their known work and just collect their obscure shit and that my friends is the COCORAN...no trip to DC is worth it without paying a visit.

I stopped off and had lunch at some NYC' esque deli, the kosher dog was from Guatemala (I am scared). I decided not to finish it and departed for a visit to the Monument. It was raining so hard I could only get close enough to see yet another Political Group raising hell on its steps. You got to hand it to the police in DC,, not only due they have to take care of the citizens, the President and his undesirables, but this city hosts anywhere from 10, 000 to 1 million visitors a day (tourists, visiting dignitaries and protestors included) and they have to keep it all in check.

I rushed home to get ready for dinner at 7:30 pm with a bunch of journalists, writers, non-profit administrators and artists from the DC area...no names please. We had drinks and a reservation that seemed to keep getting pushed back because more people arrived and were invited to dine with us at Georgia Brown's (think Mumbo Jumbo meets South City Kitchen)...all Southern-American cuisine on the gourmet tip and a lot of lets-see and be-seen. It is not uncommon to be asked for your autograph in this place and one of the people in our group got approached 3 times during dinner...

Then it was off to Adam's Morgan ...think Buckhead with a dash more culture...I lasted 50 minutes (as I discovered 40 minutes longer than I cared to hang) as we hopped from bar to bar it was becoming more and more Frat-Party-esque so I hopped into a cab and had them take me to 18th St. Lounge: 18th just above M...fly people, good attitudes, and more French speaking honeys & hunks then a bar in Morocco...loved it! Made some new friends, one really cute one named Paolo and we walked over to Andalu: couple of doors from 18th Street Lounge...same vibe as 18th Street Lounge only more on the Latin tip...yummy, then onto 1223:1223 Connecticut Avenue, and across the street from 18th Street Lounge. We danced at 1223 and by this time my Manolo Blahniks needed a rest, so we decided to chill at a club called Dragonfly just down the street from 1223. I did not make it home until just before sunrise.

It's a very rainy Saturday in Washington DC, so what do you do...Museums, Galleries and coffeehouses...DC is full of Starbucks...I mean on every corner...so I caved and went to one just to get out of the rain...before going to the modern Steven's Gallery for the Pop Art exhibit...very colorful works utilizing household objects...back to the Northumberland for a siesta then off to dinner...

NORA'S: Florida Avenue off Connecticut: this restaurant is billed as a fully Organic bistro with a magnificent wine list...they were so right on the money...after the somewhat gourmet Vegan menu I felt a bit guilt for wearing those leather pants!

NORA'S is a really cozy place...get the private room in the back that has only 3 tables...great for eavesdropping on Senators who are cheating on their spouses with aides...uh...hmmmm... the bar is the first thing you see when you come in the front door it is petite and warm...the restaurant is decorated in real exposed brick with cedar & oak wood accents with a touch of colonial decorative black-iron...I had the Free-Range Chicken with winter vegetables...amazing! We enjoyed a Merlot from Oregon a '97 that was smooth at butter...definitely check this place out.

After dessert I felt the need to get down with my peeps and headed over Republic Gardens is next door to State of the Union (good house/hip hop). It's an afro-centric spot that according to the locals is always packed, but on the ghetto side...just like I likes it!!! Sweaty brown bodies bumping and grinding to OUTKAST and `Lil Kim, then onto Club 2K9, a fairly new club that I decided couldn't quite define what it was all about. I don't know how to describe the type of crowd...I was tired by then and headed back to the apartment in the rain...very romantic walk that it was.

Sunday brought brunch & multiple Cafe' au laits at Bistro au Coin, don't ask where because I was too hung over to remember the directions to the taxi driver that my kind host barked out.

All in all DC is an experience...next time I think I will stay a week, just to take in all of the galleries & museums during the day and the Howard boys at night!!!