|
Sometimes I just want to throw in the towel. Because it’s
harder for my consonants to connect when I’m broke and can’t
buy a vowel. I feel like no one gives a hoot when I impart my wisdom
like the owl. And this pressure is starting to make me scowl. A
hit dog will holla so listen to this howl. I talk a lot of shit
but can’t get it together like loose bowels. My mental constipation
keeps me uptight like Colin Powell. And this procrastination has
all of my sentences starting with, “Tomorrow I’ll”.
In the meanwhile my unpaid bills are starting to pile. And my diet
consists of ramen noodles that taste like fowl. Lord, I’m
banging hard in the paint for rebounds, and I’m still not
getting the foul. What’s the point if tax day comes; I have
no income to file.
These words are my debt to society waiting for some equity to compile.
And the pain is making me grimace, but people think it’s a
smile. If image is nothing, why does everyone follow the same style?
My thirst is everything, and everything tastes mild. I’m on
my own, God Bless this child. My momma’s birthday is coming
and I still haven’t walked down the aisle. Because I have
no time for dating or to be beguiled. Their disgust for my lack
of attention gives them the loose neck like a cowl. I want to have
a queen to be, but they have ulterior motives when they bow. I pray
that I don’t have ulterior motives when I take my vows. Because
I have seen too many P.O.W’s (Prisoners of Weddings). I want
me and my mate to be pals, instead of her taking the maximum amount
of alimony allowed. Maybe you can’t hear my thoughts so allow
me to read this out loud. Protect me as I put my thoughts in front
of a crowd. Keep me grounded, because I can’t see if my head
is in the clouds. I confess this with my mouth. I Need You Now.
Who do you turn to when all of the emotions well up and overflow
in your soul?
As I sit in rush hour, everyone’s face seems so graven. Society
has all of these billboards of the correct formula for human existence.
Why is that formula making us nauseous?
Now we have everyone from children to elderly killing one another.
From road rage, methamphetamine mishaps, arson, suicide bombings,
disgruntled workers, gang violence, STD’s, the list goes on.
They say that God has to even out the population some kind of way.
Is it God’s divine plan, or the devil in disguise?
Even the Catholic Priests are touching little boys. Role models
like R. Kelley and Michael Jackson are pied pipering children to
do unnatural things. We are hopping on from one foot to another
to seem normal. Newsflash, if one foot is on the ground, you have
no base and risk being tripped. Freedom and originality are not
coinciding at this point of our human existence. We have fully brought
into the marketing machine that the media has formulated. And guess
what, that formula is making us nauseous.
Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It’s been two weeks
since my last confession. I know that I shouldn’t call on
your name only when I need a blessing, but see it’s this recession.
And the bill collectors keep calling and stressing. I don’t
know if the patience of Job will give me the same lesson. And lately
it seems that the answers don’t match the questions. These
trials of life are testing me, and all I want is my small niche
in the entertainment industry. All I see are these street teams
like infantries, and half of these shows don’t interest me.
I would hate to think that my shows are along the same lines because
it would incense me. I’m just trying to give back the talents
that you chose to invest in me. I feel like a lot of people want
to divest me, and how good could my best be. I’ve been cranky
because I haven’t been getting a lot of rest see, and I’m
scared that if I sleep then someone is going to creep me. These
creeps are acting like pseudo stars hanging out at the bar, telling
me how I’m going to go far. However, I can’t recant
because I barely have gas in my car.
Last week I emptied out my change jar, filled up at the station
and bought a snickers bar. I feel like I haven’t been going
anywhere for a while, and it’s getting harder to smile. Were
you the metaphor for walking the Green Mile? Right now, it seems
that spirituality is out of style. So I’ll just end this prayer
on knee mail by saying please don’t let me fail. In You Do
I Excel. As I press the send button, just know that “You’ve
Got Mail”…
It’s getting real in the field. I’m not talking about
the battlefield in Iraq. I’m speaking of the entertainment
battlefield. As a producer, promoter, and artist, it is becoming
harder to maneuver in this entertainment industry. More specifically,
the debauchery of entertaining shows in Atlanta. We have fully descended
into the satanic mentality that scared the bee Jesus out of society
no more than 30 years ago. I can’t tell the whores from good
women, straight men from gay men, men from women and vice versa.
All of society’s industry lines have been blurred, but instead
of rubbing our eyes for cleared vision, we wander blindly back out
into the wilderness. All in the name of “status quo”?
I don’t know if anyone has noticed, but we knock our selves
out not to seem broke. Newsflash, middle class doesn’t exist
anymore. Either you have cheese, or you are the rat chasing it for
survival. And the entertainment industry keeps its foot on our neck
by dropping bullshit albums. Then they have the nerve to try to
stop piracy on the internet. Hmm…let me see. I can pay $21
for a CD that has two songs that I like, or I can download it for
free. Don’t get me wrong, as an artist, I don’t like
anyone cutting into my bread, but I also would make sure that the
consumer has a comprehensive product to vibe all the way through
with. Ja Rule couldn’t have listened to himself, and thought
that was a good album. Nor can half of these hip-hop and R &
B singers. So in closing, if you keep telling these promoters that
their party is hot, or the artist that they have talent and should
keep making albums, then it is your fault, because we are feeding
them low expectations. An empty venue and albums on the shelf will
make anyone rethink their strategy. First, we have to rethink ours.
|
